Journal of a Mouse

Wednesday, October 19, 2005

Reinventing Myself

I would love to drift away from some of my problems like this little guy!

Reinventing myself is NOT EASY AT ALL! In fact, it goes along with a lot of problems that rise to the surface of my soul again and with a lot of self-doubting and feeling overwhelmed most of the time. I have bad dreams and feel drained of energy. That´s why I didn´t post so often these days, apart from the fact that I was on the road so much. I woke up early today, feeling guilty about the fact that I still don´t know what to do to earn my money and that I didn´t even start looking for a job yet. I started writing morning pages and writing down all my thoughts that make me feel so guilty. The more I wrote, the more I noticed how I was beating myself up all the time. No wonder I felt so bad! So now I´m working on putting a stop to that behavior.
After doing all that writing I put on the computer and got inspired by Hanna´s Minibook . I used the instructions from Keri Smith´s site and made one of my own. It´s funny how the little pile of cut-outs now so well reflect how I felt this morning...

Make a wish!

Happy family life.

Depression.

Homemade Revolution.

6 Comments:

At 4:46 PM, Anonymous Tine said...

Funny how the human mind works and our life can either be the most beautiful ever or close to a nightmare and all is due to what we think and keep telling ourselves. It's both fascinating and terrible.

I love the page you made wiht the dandylion (did I spell that right?hahah) and am tempted to turn my monitor around so I can read it but I'll try to twist myself instead...might have to climb up onto the desk for reading the lower left corner, hahaha!

So inspiring on this rainy grey dark day here today :-)

 
At 7:42 PM, Blogger Bea said...

Thanks for your comment, Tine! I´m so glad you enjoy the dandylion page! I quoted something there, by a woman from Iceland who gave an interview about what she thinks is important in raising her two daughters. It´s something I want to keep in my mind when having children of my own one day.

 
At 11:04 PM, Anonymous tine said...

Oh boy I'm all dizzy now after reading the dandelion. I might just start writing in circles myself, hahah! But it is true what she said, very wise woman and very lucky daughters to have such a mother, wow!

 
At 3:26 AM, Anonymous eloqui said...

bea - I wanted to email you this, but can't find an address for you. There is a fine book called 'Soul Without Shame' which you might enjoy just now - subtitled 'A guide to liberating yourself from the judge within'... It's by Byron Brown.
On my page there's a 'MyLibraryThing' Link - and you'll find a direct link to an amazon page of the book there -with excerpts and reviews,too, I think. : )
I love collage for moving things along, too. Good work! : ) xxx

 
At 10:20 AM, Blogger Bea said...

Thank you very much, Eloqui! I looked it up and put it on my amazon wishlist, so I won´t forget when I place my next order!

 
At 1:06 AM, Anonymous eloqui said...

You're welcome, Bea - glad it appeals to you. : ) xxx

 

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